one by one

One By One

I feel the ground moving under my feet, all I know is where I don't belong.
I'm not interested in sticking around just for the sake of a good time.
Houses rotting from the the inside out and everybody's pissed out of their fucking minds.
Are you seriously talking to me about community?

One by one, shoot off my fingers one by one.
Where do we go from here? Where do we go from here?
When the rebels lose the spirit of rebellion.

You've got nowhere left to go.
But I know I'm not alone.

We are defined by what we stand against and the weight of unfulfilled expectations. This culture that threatens to engulf you, is this anyway to go about fighting it?
I don't want to be born again, I don't need anybody to speak for me.
I'm not interested in humoring illusions or apologizing for the sake of sentiment.

One by one, shoot off my fingers one by one.
Where do we go from here? Where do we go from here?
When the rebels lose the spirit of rebellion.

You've got nowhere left to go.
But I know I'm not alone.

26 04 4.02pm

The book I'm reading at the moment, has two children/brothers in it called jack and Daniel. Someone <3s there tenesee whisky!


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26 04 4.33pm

Oh god... I can't concentrate... I still hve 45 minutes of thus flight left. Can I be bothered enough to finish part 2? Maybe not....
Hang on.. I've lost part one :(

Ah wait, its ok, I haven't.

So, an eventful weekend away has reminded me- I'm not a grown up yet and I don't want to be. My mother and I had a strange conversation about having babies in ur late twenties today. So odd. My father didnt want to get married I don't think. Maybe I get that gene from him. I certainly get my binge drinking skills from him.

What my mother said makes sense though. My brother and I don't have that same connection with our parents as friends of ours that have parents three or four years younger. Although I've never worked out it that was age or simply because my family is a litre bit (alot) odd.

Back to the current drama.. Perhaps why scares me the most is I haveseveral times daydreamed of a future with subject of this argument. The party girl wants a future?

We've now moved to the second part ofthe argument. We are no longer friends. Facebook accounts and phone numbers deleted. U know its offical when facebook comes into it.

(slight off topic deviation... U to replace you... Is this blatant misuse of the English language or simplification of an overly complex language by a fast moving generation? Let's debate it later...)

I'm considering calling a truce tonight. Half of my makes me feel weak. Half of me thinks I might just be chasing true live after all.

Fwd: 26 04 4.12pm

How strange. When someone u know has cancer it no longer becomes a word you see on posters, a word you know nothing about. It becomes so real. It seems like no one else knows the reality this is so far from the truth, but how do u find someone u can relate too.

Theres a project about to happen in Canada that makes me want to change the world. A drop in centre. Information, people, the real experience of dealing with cancer and the support of others to get you through it.

http://www.skateforcancer.com/
Facebook page :

Support awareness.


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Fwd: Its going to be one of those nights... Were tired is the new black

Its going to be one of those nights... Were tired is the new black


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Saturday 24 April

I'm here to laugh love fuck and drink liqour
Andhelp the damn revolution come quicker....


Got a problem?


The coup has it COVERED


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argument..,

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> So begins the continual argument..,
>
> Can guys and girls be 'just' friends?
>
> How do you deal with the inevitable attraction that seems to happen
> at least for one or the other some point in the relationship.
>
> I'm in an interesting situation right now. This guy and I were
> seeing each other a year ago. I had feelings for him and I was
> pretty much sex and some good company to him nothing more. The more
> emotionally tied up I got, the harder it was to be around him. We
> had an amazing friendship, it was natural progression almost that we
> would end up together. I saw future, he saw many other fish in the
> sea.
>
> Now I'm the strong resilient type , it was time for me to get over
> him. So I did. I planned an amazing holiday. I escaped. Over him I
> was or so I thought. Hurrah!
>
> Not long after I got back... Well pretty soon after that our
> friendship seemed to be ok. But distance makes the heart grow
> fonder, and we slipped - taking an evening out that one step too far
> the night before his turn to escape.
>
> Naturally I woke up confused.., what did I need this for? I'm an
> independent modern woman. He turned me down for so long and I'm
> supposed to jump
> Now that he's changed his mind.
>
> I spent the weekend with a very different group I friends and it was
> atually the building block for a very valuable friendship. It made
> me reaffirm to myself I was better than that, I didn't need it..
> Yay.. Go me. You could almost say my outlook changed that week. A
> week later when he returned he received a very different reception
> to what he was expecting.
>
> The result- a very abusive fizzle of a friendship.
>
> Fast foward.. To now. Were back in the friend zone. The rules are
> clear. We are friends and we roll in thesame group of friends. Its
> great....... But.... Yes there is a but....
>
> Apparently I'm not allowed to be friends with this group of friends
> unless he is present. WHAT. Yes I know - ludicrus - but its
> happeing. Jealousy? Who knows?
>
> I can think of so many mature ways to deal with this, however I've
> opted
> For the dramatic , ultimatum way. My way or the highway...
>
> I should have known this would all be ending in tears again....
>
> ( to be continued )
>
>
> Sent from my iPod

I just cleaned out...

My iphone notes... Many out of date blogs below that never made it to
email...

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491 days ago

Keep thinkingsboutthe things we talked about
Do u want to get to knowme ?

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531 days ago this was on my mind

It's apt that I'm listening to bloc party and reading George Orwell
again? Is apt the right word? Anyway because I'm flying back to
Adelaide again ( which I'm sure I need to count on two hands now the
amount of times I've been back since the big move) and thinking about
the great weekend I have once again had. But did I have a good weekend?
I spent all weekend wondering why I was missing calls ( iPhone was on
silent - didn't realize - nojoke)
I spent my planned party night with peole I barely know who are
6+years younger than me ( for the record I had a blast and I love
laughing and arguing over non changeable/mouldable life shit)
This also there fire caused me to spend much less money than planned
on booze and allow me a few guilty pleasures.

The period from about 2am to 8am sun morning feeling completely in
secure about myself for no reason except paranoia
I spent a lot of time listening to peeps joke about my 'apparent'
relationship and actually felt ok with everything they said , losing
that cut feeling I always used to get.
I still haven't learnt to read the one person who means the most to me
right now

Yes blogs are lame! Who cares your the one reading it because you want
to know what I'm thinking.
The reality is I don't care anymore, about anything. Break my heart
baby and watch me fal

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So...501 days ago

So...
Another journey .. Another chance to test myself.. This time I laid
down the law but find myself willing to run if I'm Asked too. And that
surprises me. The stark realisation of how my summer is going to pan
out has definitely hit.

I'm kinds proud but kind of diapointes in myself.

Let's see the outcome of the weekened!!

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Until they become conscious, they will never rebel, and until after they have rebelled they cannot become conscious

Until they become conscious, they will never rebel, and until after
they have rebelled they cannot become conscious

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